DAPS OriginalPolitics

Election 2016: 45 People Who Have Taken Steps To Be America’s Next President

TrippyCup For Prez 2016
By now, you’ve probably already heard of presidential hopeful, Deez Nuts, an independent candidate who’s taken the world by the balls. It seems absurd that a candidate might run with that name, but this was real news and not an Onion headline. Unfortunately, research into this promising candidate has revealed that Deez is actually a 15 year old Iowa boy. While Deez has another 20 years before he can legally take office, there are other intriguing candidates who we recommend looking into.

First off, we suggest that you ignore the “Deez Nuts” copycat crew. Sadly, since Mr. Nuts’ candidacy announcement, a slew of unoriginal wannabe Nuts have come out of the woodwork for their 15 minutes of fame. This unoriginality is why we cannot endorse the following real candidates: BOFA DEEZ NUTS (I -FL), DEEZ W. NUTS (O -NY), DAT ASS (I  -NY), or DIS PUSSY (D -FL). These four represent “more of the same,” which we don’t need at this vital juncture in American history, so we’ll move on to some candidates who are truly worth looking into.

New Candidates For Deez Nuts Supporters:

Click the candidate names to see their official applications. Click PDF to see the ACTUAL form that the candidate submitted. We’ve Separated them into categories for your convenience.

New Faces

tc

 

Famous Faces
underwood

 

Meme Faces

thoooooose

 

Satanic Faces

satan

 

…and Finally

 

We hope you take this information and choose the candidate that’s right for you. It’s your duty as a citizen, or we may end up with President Donald Trump. See the full list of  individuals who have filed a Statement of Candidacy, here.

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Chris Olivieri

Chris Olivieri

I'm a polymath with ADD, Entrepreneur, & ENTP whose aim is to emphasize awesomeness in pop-culture. I've described the contents of my mind as "Similar to Heffalumps and Woozles"